Eggs, shots and rock n roll

Sunday, August 07, 2005

Shooting stars

We spent the weekend in the cabin by the lake, all alone. It was so much fun and so relaxing. The weather was wonderful, sunny, warm, a little wind, no clouds... We swam in the lake, took a long walk and made a fire when the sun came down. It felt so good being all alone with P. Things are so simple with him. When the sun was completely gone from the sky, we put a blanket in the grass and lied there, gazing at the stars. The sky was so clear, the satrs so bright, we felt so very small looking up at the universe. We saw many shooting stars, but I didn't have the time to make a wish.

Yesterday night, as I've done every night before for the last 3 weeks, I tried to feel Pépin move by pressing gently on my belly. I had felt something, two weeks ago. Something that seemed different than just my digestive system working, but nothing really clear. I felt, for about 3 seconds, like tiny bubbles inside my belly, very very deep and very small and gentle. Only 3 or 4 bubbles, then nothing. And it never came back, as much as I wanted it to. So yesteray, I was still trying to feel something when P decided to try too. He placed his hand on my lower belly and pressed. I almost immediately felt something very weird and very unique. I was sure it was the baby, no doubt about it. Pépin seemed to be wiggling a lot, I felt some tiny tiny kicks or something, very small and deep, but very clear. I was absolutely sure this was not my digestive system! I couldn't believe it, but there was no way my intestine was wiggling like that. It felt almost like a little fish in a small plastic bag, like when you buy it, swiming in all directions and bumping into the plastic bag. When P took is hand away, the feeling disappeared. So I begged him "Again! Again!!" And he placed his hand back and pressed again. And I still could feel the baby move! P even felt a small movement under his hand, something really subtle. He kept his hand there for a long time, I couldn't get enough of the little fish wiggling. I cannot feel anything when I'm not lying on my back and not pressing on my belly. And it doesn't work every time, but P always has to push the same spot and the feeling are always the same. It's so unbeleivable... For years, that moment seemed like an impossible dream and now, it is so real, so strong...

I may not have had the time to wish upon a shooting star, but I have a feeling the star had the time to read what my heart was wishing for...

2 comment(s):

That is so awesome! Wishing you thousands more of those fluttery feelings!

By Blogger Sandy, at 5:46 PM  

That's beautiful. I'd be crying over it if I wasn't already crying over other stuff.

By Blogger Lala, at 6:40 PM  

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